When I Look At You

 

 

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When I look at you, I see the story in your eyes” The Night Begins to Shine

“With a love that will echo through the ages.” Woodrow to Edna….on The Simpsons

 

If you’re an avid reader of Stephen King, you’ll recognize the central point of good over evil. The situations King places his characters in are mostly ridiculous, but when you look into the small print, you’ll see that we face those same challenges everyday. I think what I take the most from his novels, is that in the end, regardless of whom wins, and whom loses, the characters have a choice….we also have a choice….we may not be fighting Satan, The Walking Man, It, nor Misery….but we do choose to fight….or flight. When I Look At You…..Life is all about choices…make good ones! Yep, this kills me every time.

When I Look At You

I see a man not perfect man, (and sometimes) not smart, but I do see a Warrior, and when the demons of my past threaten the angels of my present, you’re all I need beside me to fight them together. I’m insecure, and the fat on my back, with the lines on my face obsess me and compel to focus on the singularity of my flaws, but you gently remind me of what is truly is that makes me beautiful in your sight. The frustrations of my norm, sometimes overwhelm my ability to cope, yet you take me by the hand, and help me see the illusions for what the are. I see the true love and faith you have in me, I see the good I didn’t deserve….given to me, in you. I see a man that makes beautiful children, both biological and adoptive….Patient and loving, you did well, raising another generation of YOU. I see a man who made the choice to stay and fight, even when I didn’t want him……

When I look at you, I see us…. struggling, begging GOD for a son. Mischievous, intelligent and curious, I see a boy angry at the injustices of the world, while just understanding the evils that men do. I know that once you understand the true nature of your power, you will lead with fairness and honor. No slight will be forgotten, no request for forgiveness ignored, you’re like your father…with those blue eyes, deep in thought, living for the present, damning the future. You drive me NUTS, but I see the little man you will become, not yet ready for responsibility you will be given, but not weak enough to back down.

When I look at, I see laughter, deviousness, strength and courage. I see a young warrior, much like your father. You’re not yet old enough understand your fate, but I don’t see you backing down. I see stubbornness, a refusal to give up, nor give in to the wrongs committed upon your person. I see POWER…and MIGHT…as they combine at the apex of good versus evil….I see steadfastness, next to faithfulness…..gifts that will combine to fight the monsters in the world. I see passion with temper, for woe is any man who dares to cross you sideways. I see a little girl, much like her mother, only without the ass to back her up. Be careful whom you cross little Duchess…..but never back down.

Your Thoughts:

“When I look into your eyes I see my grandmother. You were born on the anniversary of her death, exactly 1 year later. Now that day is a cause for celebration instead of sorrow. I can’t help but wonder if she had a hand in that! I look into your eyes and I see her looking back at me, I swear. I see forgiveness, love, hope, pride, and a second chance I never thought I would get. How proud she would be of you and me if she were here to see us, little one. I see the resilience that my grandmother worked so hard to instill in me looking back at me. Only this time, it needed no coaching. You were born with that glint in your eyes, my dear. Almost as if…when you were born a piece of Grammy’s soul was already infused with yours. I feel as if she is here with me when you are by my side. I love you with my entirety, Daughter. Thank you for bringing a bit of my grandma back to this earth with you.” Britta Conley

When I look in your eyes I feel disappointed for the man you have become. I feel anger for how many times you have cheated on me and hurt me to the point where I’m broken and unable to ever be fixed. I feel sadness because when I met you I knew you could be great, if you desired to reach your full potential. When I look into your eyes I feel pity for the lack of pride you have for yourself. I feel anger and resentment that I stay even after all the wrongdoings. When I look into your eyes I feel anger for the 10 years you have allowed your children to walk all over me, talk to me crazy and steal from me. I feel disrespected by all the times you allowed your family or children’s mothers to talk down at me or crazy about me. When I look into your eyes I feel uncertainty that I will be able to spend the rest of my life with you. I feel that I am too damaged to go on some days and others shine bright on the outside, while dying inside. When I look into your eyes I feel nothing anymore, because how do you continue to feel after all your feelings have been used up and wasted. Anonymous

The complexity of King’s characters give some insights into who will ultimately win the battles and who will ultimately lose their life. It’s ironic, much as it is in life, that the simpler minded the character, the better the chances of survival, but the ones willing to lose their lives, are the Warriors….The ones willing to stand up, and then stand down EVIL in this world become the hero’s….We need that in this world today…I think we’ve found it…when they’re all ready. King’s novels give us a chance to know the players, to become invested, to root for and against their perils…..When I Look At You, I see the complexity of a King character…..I see Fighters, I see strengths and weaknesses, laughter and tears, victories and I see defeats, but that which does not kill us….only makes us stronger…When I Look At You…..I see….the next line, is up to you. Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Monday.

 

 

 

 

 

Triggered

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Getting filled with hate after seeing, hearing or experiencing something you can’t stand” Urban Dictionary

Triggered, Yeah…we all get it.

I have my buttons. Some are easily pushed, some not so much, but after spending some time on other pages, I realized something. The self-righteousness many experience while patting themselves on the back, comes back and bites them in the ass, when another troll figures out their buttons. For me, it’s about my kids. Shoot, spend any amount of time on the Veronica Philips Facebook page, and you’ll see me insulted, degraded, taunted and teased, but what I will not tolerate is when someone brings in my kids. I don’t really know why some would stoop to that level, but whatever, if you’re the kind of individual that gets your kicks from bringing kids into your battles, you’re a special kind idiot. Triggered…..Meh, happens to the best of us.

The mere mention of Donald Trump, 45th President of the United States, brings a certain level of animosity to this column. Further that with, “He IS the President. He IS your President. Deal with it“, and you got yourself a debate. Now, lets talk about religion, the Pope, Catholics, Gays, lesbians, transgenderism, rape, feminists, millennials, The Mayor of Danville, Obama….and you’re sure to ensure that the popcorn flows freely on any thread mentioning, or even advocating for the above listed insults. Colin Kaepernick triggered an entire demographic with his refusal to stand for the National Anthem, and then, many more were triggered when Trump, called NFL players who wouldn’t stand for the National Anthem Sons of Bitches….No, he should not have DONE that…..but before you congratulate yourself on not being off the deep end of those issues….consider this…..

Milo brought Berkley to National attention by showing the lengths they would go to, to keep him off Campus. Trump is President because Democrats couldn’t give a decent option. Seriously, they didn’t. Any American President should NOT be commenting on social issues. If left alone, we will figure it out. Kaepernick, may have had pure intentions, but he did nothing to further the cause of African-American disparity in this country. There is a difference between bringing an issue to light, and bringing an issue UP. Learn it. The Pope is teaching heresy. Even Christ denounced divorce. Feminists today are not the feminists of yesterday, they don’t speak for me. Rape is always rape. It doesn’t matter what SHE was drinking or wearing. Piss off. The Mayor of Danville is not lining his pockets you absolute morons. If you don’t believe in Christ, fine, but don’t mock Him. If Faith brings comfort to a hurting soul who are we to opine differently? Gays should have the right to marry. Caitlyn Jenner is not a true example of a transgender. She’s earned nothing to deserve respect. Ignore her, she’ll go away. Babies should not be aborted when there are so many families that would love them. The greatest pain a woman will ever go through, is the pain of not being able to conceive. Murder is murder. Not standing for the National Anthem, is the right of every American citizen. Free Speech is indeed free, but not free from consequence. If you don’t like it, don’t support the NFL. Amiri King may be The KING, but his followers get just as triggered as any Liberal Snowflake I’ve ever read, AND Catholics are NOT real Christians….Relax, I’m kidding.

In my entire life, I’ve never, ever encountered a society as prone to offense as this one, and what makes the ideal truly insulting is that most of it, is due to media hype and gossip. My God people, most of you left High School a long time ago. Why on earth, you’d even put yourself through the misery of being miserable, I’ll never understand, but in a way, I do benefit, so carry on. Triggered….even if you’re angry and upset, there is a societal norm, a standard, that dictated what lines we should and should not cross. Facebook is indeed the devil. Mel Brooks said, “I will not make fun of dead children, the gas chambers, or the deaths of those at the hands of Nazi’s“….That a good start. For everything else, including my kids, remember that to be offended is easily remedied….don’t respond, change the channel, ignore a friend. For everything else…There’s Mastercard, and yes, debt is funny. Now discuss….but only if you’re triggered that is….Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. Be kind to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those whom cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Sunday.

 

It Gets Better

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“I need to talk to him. We really need them to give 100% to each other.” Sweetness’s Instructor at The Studio. His new Taekwondo home. She’s discussing his inability to punch a girl in the face….ironic, given that I don’t have a problem with it.

“Yeah well, he can fight….ahem…Spar. You just gotta get him in the zone”. Me

It Gets Better….We both miss “Home”

HOME is where ever you lie your head! I get it now….

It’s Saturday morning here….7:30am to be precise, while it’s 9:30am for most of you. I no longer have a north-facing bay window to look out and inspire me, I now have a hillside with flowers and roses…..I’m painfully aware of my declaration that “Happiness is your choice“, but really, there are other variables that come into play. Sweetness has found a new Taekwondo home, and it was cute the way he walked in the first time, with this 3rd degree belt, and went to the head of the line. The look on his classmates faces was priceless. We don’t advertise his Black Belt…..That boy worked hard for his belt….the honor did NOT come cheap….but even though there’s a certain level of comfort he finds in his daily workouts, he’s still not hitting a girl…The Kruger’s have tried on many occasions to get him to do so….but he won’t….. It Gets Better……I’m sure it does….we just have to create a new level of normal now.

So with two jobs now, I can get on with the business of shopping for Fall clothing. My hysterectomy 12 wks behind me, I’m feeling better, and my foot injury is almost good. LOL, at least it doesn’t hurt anymore. We’re going to a cultural festival today; which ironically enough, we went to one in Danville, one year ago today….or so Facebook tells me. We’ve been in California a little over one month, I haven’t seen it rain one time, but the weather did cool down to 72 yesterday, inspiring me to buy some Mums….Duchess is in Tumbling, Sweetness in Band and Martial Arts…Merrill just freaking WORKS all the damned time, so yes, I believe they are moving right along……it always takes me a tad bit longer….but on a bright note, California did approve my nursing license….so YEA!

It Gets Better, but only if you change your standards of Norm. Meaning, nothing is going ever be the same again. I DID get screwed moving out here, but so what? Sh*t happens, and besides, God helps those whom help themselves, and really, that’s not Biblical….I just made that up. Sweetness and I told Master P, his new 7th Degree Mentor….that to be back in Taekwondo had a familiar level of comfort that has helped him adjust to his new surroundings…..maybe I’ll get there too. What was it I loved so much about Illinois? The corn fields…..I used to look out that north-facing bay window at dusk, and just watch the combines go back and forth, harvesting the crops…..there was something Midwest Magical about the harvest….but I’m not in the Midwest anymore….and the sooner I realize that, the sooner I can kick some ass out here. I mean, REALLY Ronnie get your mess together. WTH is wrong with you? So, It Gets Better….and it does, but better is not going to be SAME….understand the difference in THAT, and you have learned a Kingdom Key to Life #167….Better, is NOT, the SAME……Gotta go. We’re going out as a family today. We did this in Germany too…Remember Brat Fam? Remember being in a new country, and your parents traveling, just to make the time pass? Yep….we didn’t appreciate that either….. Maybe I just need a fight to loosen the bat in my ass. I mean, should be easy, there’s enough to annoy me out here, AND I’m outside the reach of my 5th Degree Mentor….LOL, I’m FREEEEEE! Be Blessed.

Remember you set The Tone, you ARE The Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Saturday.

Am I Old?

When I Wasn't Old
When I Wasn’t Old

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Mom, I get embarrassed when you drop me off,  and your whack 80’s, 90’s music is playing” Sweetness

Whack? Whack? My music is Funky Fly Fresh BOY!!!!

Am I Old?

 

As a child my mom would play all these records from the 60’s and 70’s, with songs like, “Beach Baby”, “Help Me Rhonda” and the like…From Jan and Dean, to The Beach Boys, from Janis Joplin to Tony Orlando and Dawn, I knew all the words to all the songs. It made me happy to sing with my mother, because we had a connection as my 5yr old little booty would do The Twist in the kitchen with her….I didn’t think she was old, only that her records were cool….Later, as I grew up, and became a child of the 80’s, we had Van Halen, Micheal Jackson, Whitney Houston, PRINCE…then I began to think that her music would gag me with a spoon. Am I Old? No….I can’t be. I’m a hip mom, who’s TOTALLY AWESOME!

I remember when a young unknown actor by the name of Nicholas Cage was pouring his heart out to a woman who would go on to be a big NOBODY in Hollywood….That movie was Valley Girl. Last American Virgin asked the question if teenagers really could control their urges….Fast Times at Ridgemont High had the most famous bathroom scene EVER. I still can’t watch a Judge Reinhold without thinking about him in that pirate costume and The Cars in the back ground. I did digress. Our school colors were neon pink and yellow, the Fall fashion line included the the silver glove with the parachute pants, Thriller was a must see, and Scrunchie’s (which I still ROCK, thank you very much) kept our feathered bangs from hanging in our very make up faces.  Our times, were good. We were “80, 80, 8..8…that’s the year we graduate”…..”Love is good, sex is great (although, many hadn’t yet had sex, just saying), 88 is when we graduate” (needed work)…so I’m Not Old….Hell, my generation wrote the book on cool…we were…Funky Fly Fresh…and by golly, my son had better check himself, before he wrecks himself.

I shaved my head like Lauper, I wore the tulle skirts of Madonna, I WAS the Virgin, I totally thought George Michael’s was so FINE (how did we miss that?), WHAM was the BOMB YO….so, my music, dear boy, is NOT WHACK….it’s illin’ chillin’, stylin’ and profilin’. My decade gave your smart ass The Beastie Boy, The Cars, Led Zepplen (just kidding), Run DMC, New Wave, Rap, Blondie…so really, there’s not way, I can be old….can I? So what, if my grey is covered, and my skin enhanced? So what, if my clothing is Dior instead of Lands End? Shoot, I’d kill for an Izod/Polo pull-over right now….BOY. I’m not old, I’m experienced, and I know good music when I hear it…I can jam like Jam Master J, I can Not Sleep until I get to Brooklyn, I CAN fight for my right to party, and I do WANNA dance with somebody. My Rapture isn’t going to heaven, but a man from mars eating cars, I have The Right Stuff (they’re still touring BTW), Rick Springfield told me to Love Somebody, and I DID….Tone Loc made The Wild Thing cool, and really, if you ask around, people understand that Milli Vanilli was fake AS HELL, but they don’t give a damn! So, Am I Old? Sigh….I dunno…maybe, but if I want to jam Thrift Store by Macklemore….well, I own the Escalade that’s driving your weak, punk ass to school, I’m gonna, because here’s the secret…tell me I’m embarrassing you…and I’ll bring a gun to a knife fight (The Untouchables)….you feel me? No? Well get your ass out of the car, and don’t mind my Boy George, “I’ll Tumble For Ya“….as I jam it on a level 10 YO! That’s just sweet music to God’s Ear. Be Blessed.

Remember you set The Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Friday.

Do Unto Others

Love Each Other?
Love Each Other?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

All things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them.” Jesus…Sermon on the Mount.

The thing that really struck me was that from the moment we walked in, we were treated like Rock Stars. Like they were so happy to see us, you don’t find in an employer/employee relationship these days” Ronnie

We ARE happy to have you. Welcome Nurse Ronnie“….Human Resources

 

Do Unto Others

 

Okay, so Christ DID say it, and frankly, if He said it, you can bet it needs to be followed. Many sociologist, and other observers of the climate these days will pontificate and opine on when they knew the country….nay…the World was going to hell. Some will tell you it was when women had to leave the home and work, others will tell you it started with the Free Love movement of the 70’s and Asbury Park, others will tell you it was when the Beatles, and their, “We’re greater than Jesus” comment came out, and yet others, will tell you it was during the self-absorbed excesses of the 80’s. I don’t know, for all those people are by far more educated than I, but I can tell you I’ve been watching human behavior for most of my life, and I think it was when we forgot the magic words, Please and Thank you. Do Unto Others……Yeah, I know. You should always do as I say, and not as I do.

It’s simple Humanistics 101. I’ve written it before, that patients with dementia, Alzheimer’s, even total strangers may never be able to recall what you’ve done for them, but trust me friends, people will always remember how you make them feel. I remember the days gone by, when I was ruthlessly teased for my red curly hair. Guess what? I own that mess now, but it goes farther than that. It’s the crossing guard who went out of his way to walk me home the day after I fought back against my bullies. It’s the Lowe family who never made us feel poor. It’s the Nurse, whom after a really rough night with Duchess in the ICU looked at me and said, “I got you Fam. go home“. It’s the way you all comment, and respond with true feelings of joy, anguish, and tears…because you trust me enough to confide….but there’s a dark side to it too….

When you make the cashier feel bad for being a cashier. When you sneer at the homeless and yell at them to go get a job. When you take your frustrations out on Customer Service for a product they didn’t build. We do have a nasty habit, of forgetting that were it not for a meager paycheck, we’d be in their shoes too. Last Christmas I challenged you to go and encourage 5 strangers. Many of you did…imagine a world where we are kind to each other…..then imagine that the power to make or break someone’s day, relies solely in our hands….because it does. Sometimes, I forget what it was that made me a part of your day. I started this column with the story of two men in Wal-Mart. One man, older in age, walked up to a younger man and started talking to him like he knew him….He was confused. Rather than interrupt the older gentleman, the younger one just stood, listened and politely responded….when the older man walked away, the younger man’s wife asked, “Who was that?” “I have no idea“….He responded, and walked away. Oh I KNOW I get mad and frustrated. I know I say that maybe I shouldn’t say, do things that I shouldn’t do, react in ways that make you think it’s okay to be an asshole, but it isn’t. Sitting in that orientation this morning, I felt encouraged, because an extreme shortage of nurses in this area, has made all nurses gold, and guess what, they’re willing to pay top dollar for the ones who want to work there….Do Unto Others. The fate of someone’s entire world, does indeed rest within your hands. Think about it. What if you said, “Please” or “No, thank you” to the question, “Do you want to up size that?”….For me, I learned long ago to say, “I appreciate YOU” instead of “I appreciate it” because it really does change my tone….and how it’s received. So, I am not a Role Model….I am simply a woman, who sometimes forgets how she made her bones. Tomorrow, encourage 3 people…..just 3, and you’ve bettered the world, by 3 actions. It’s an ugly world anyway….I’d think any improvement, would not go amiss…..Do Unto Others….Jesus had this one right, but really, did you ever doubt Him? Oh yeah, I did….Shhhhh…..do as I say, and not as I do. Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE The Example. Be Kind to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Thursday.

 

YOU

Love Jesus 1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If YOU don’t talk to your kids about drugs, someone else will” Commercial from the 80’s

Only YOU can prevent forest fires” Smokey the Bear..

YOU had the power within you the whole time” I think, it’s the Never Ending Story, or some cheesy movie I once watched.

YOU do YOU Boo Boo” Kevin Hart.

Only YOU, can be YOU.

Have you ever felt like it’s just one of those lives? Ya know the one, where nothing works out the way it’s supposed to? Yeah, well…me too. This whole Nursing License has been one cluster after another, and honestly, I thinks it’s worse than the school itself. All the requirements that California has, combined with all the requirements that Illinois doesn’t have, you’d think that the Left Coast doesn’t trust the Midwest when it comes to educating their students, and while there may be some truth in that, there has to be some middle ground. You….the power to achieve fame, fortune, success and failure all rests within your hands….but it’s hard to see that, when all you’re doing is banging your head against the wall.

Calling me after I emailed a copy of my BLS Red Cross certification, the District RN asked if I had taken my First Aid/CPR course on-line. “No” I began, “I was there in person. It’s just that Illinois wanted to save a tree”….silence….”Perhaps you can come in and do a skills check” she suggested. In the end,  I was able to convince her, that I had indeed had hands-on experience in the field in which I Repped. My goodness, I’ve run CODES in the back of an Ambulance. I’ve assisted on Cardiac emergencies, almost had a baby shot out at me, and please, do I have to even get into how many times, I’ve patched up the kiddo’s because they told someone to, “Hold my Kool-aid and watch this“?, So yeah, I’ve got some experience….but lets be honest, that’s not what’s bugging me right now.

I got proverbially screwed moving out here. Not being able to go back to school, not being able to work right away, I’ve had to read the glorious stories of my classmates creating and developing Care Plans, Case Studies, Clinicals….I was with them…I was one of them last year. The weather has turned slightly cool here. The leaves are falling gently from the trees, the breeze is enough to make me pull out my oversized sweatshirts. Soon, I’ll pull out the moon boots you all hate, and then, I’ll be drinking hot chocolate by the fire…I’ll be passing out Halloween candy to all the little creative tykes on the block, I’ll be roasting the roasts for Italian Beef, and then, it will be time for the Festival of Trees. That fabulous event that took me two decades to score tickets too….The Princess Tea balls, Mayor His Majesty reading to the children in the center of the Civic Center, and I….won’t be there for any of it…Sigh. I have to take a step back, and remember my vows. The one that specifically promised that I would stick with him through thick and thin, richer and poorer, sickness and health. I have to remember that anything that happens here….is strictly my choice.

When life hands you a raw deal, it’s nothing personal. Our lives are a growth chart. A way of testing us, to see if we’ve retained all the information we learned. I think the point of this very long-winded column, is that my happiness (your happiness as well), relies on your, mine, and our ability to make the most of any situation we find ourselves in….so things don’t always work out….so what? The trick is maybe, just maybe, being flexible enough to wait out the bad parts, and rejoice when the good happens. No one person can make YOU happy. Ohers help, but in the end, as we stand before our Creator, the question will be, “What have YOU done, to make the world a better place?” and by golly if you try to come up with an excuse like, “The alarm didn’t wake me up in time“, you’ll be in some trouble. So, really YOU… had/have the power to make your life amazing. I gotta tell ya, I have almost everything I’ve ever wanted, and then some…so reading about the lives of friends I no longer live around, the galas I won’t attend, the Festivals that will go on without me, should not make me sad, but happy…mostly because I made amazing memories there…..and that’s okay. So my license will be in soon….I’m going through school nurse orientation tomorrow….Gala tickets, for Sweetness’s school district, go on sale in 30 minutes, and Merrill’s plane landed safely. I’d say, I’m winning….even if it feels like I’m losing sometimes. YOU….only YOU can do you…..Only YOU can be the Rock star God intended, and by golly, only YOU can make YOU happy. Guess I’ll take it and make it mine….make your life yours..as well. Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Wednesday….I have some Gala tickets to buy. Wish me luck.

 

 

I Don’t Care

Not Caring Is An Option
Not Caring Is An Option

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Are you asking me that because I’m black, or because you want my opinion?” Friend

Um, because you’re black?”….Ronnie

FINE, I’ll tell you what I HATE. I hate people who post to Facebook  just to get a rise out of others!”

Oh, um….yeah…..I hate that too!” …..Shhhh

I Don’t Care….Suck It!

In the last 24 hours, I’ve been called a dumb ass, slut, bitch, been told that others felt sorry for my kids, advised to kill myself…and well, those were the kind. Following the advice of a friend, I have been out and about…kinda feeling up the situation, trying to smell what The Rock is cooking, but honestly, if you let things get to you, others have power…and if there’s one thing I don’t like, it’s when others have power over me. It’s the main reason I started my own business in Danville, Illinois. I intentionally write things, that I know is going to trigger others, because why not? The funny part, is that many don’t get my sarcasm. Group mobbing also has a lot to do with it, but honestly, many of the folk I’ve encountered are probably good, church going folk….I know that….because I am one too. I Don’t Care….I didn’t start off to play the heel, but come on, sex, racism, and hate SELL!

Kevin Hart had an affair, it was filmed, then he was extorted an enormous fee to keep the video quite. It was quite smart of him to give the tape to the FBI, and not fall for the Ponzi scheme, but not smart that he cheated. We love to drown our hero’s don’t we? I feel badly for him…as bad as I can feel for a serial cheater anyway, and I’m just waiting for the announcement that he’s going into drug rehab with his new-found Spiritual leaders, Al Sharpton, or maybe Jesse Jackson…who knows? On an unrelated note, Hobby Lobby made national news with a cotton display in their Arts and Crafts aisle. Someone took offense to it, labeled it as Racism, then decided that social media was an appropriate forum to air said grievance. I think about the story of Emmett Till, the 14yr old little boy murdered for whistling at a white woman. Decades after his death, the white woman, Carolyn Bryant, admitted to lying about him. She was complicit in his murder…..Now, I’m no social professor, nor am I a highly educated woman, but I would think of THAT….as racism, but what do I know? I just keep thinking that when we see Racism where none exists, it’s going to be harder to rally the troops, when true racism rears its ugly head…and it will….bet money!

Urban Dictionary defines “White-Splaining” as:

The paternalistic lecture given by Whites toward a person of color defining what should and shouldn’t be considered racist, while obviously exhibiting their own racism“.

Makes sense. It’s like telling a woman, whose boss just rubbed his junk on her back, that she’s reading too much into the touch. Maybe I have no right to dictate what is, and is not, racism. I haven’t experience racism, sexism yes, racism no….Therefore, I can’t possibly KNOW what it feels like….My husband hasn’t cheated on me….so to comment on the Kevin Hart debacle, would be slightly disingenuous. However, I Don’t Care. Princeton is now doing away with the term, “Freshman” opting instead for a gender neutral term. There are some Bibles that have done away with the masculine form of God, so as not to offend someone; which as a digression, the Bible offends okay? It just does…it’s supposed to…I mean, if you have an issue with me, can’t you just step to me without bringing in the kids? It’s like nothing is sacred anymore….and if nothing is sacred, then slowly everything becomes off-limits, and if everything becomes off limits, then the social bonds that used to hold us together fade….and if they fade….there’s no safety net, and friends, regardless of color, politics, race, gender, affiliation, or penis/vagina status, we all need safety nets.

The day that poor little mentally challenged, soldier wanna be asshole, attacked me as a Nazi, a dozen friends came over and flamed his ASS….safety net. The day I watched a mother brutally beat her toddler in his car seat and I intervened, then followed her until police arrived…safety net. The day I punched a man in the face, because no one else would do it for me…..Ah….no safety net….get it? I’ve stood up for many, backed down to few. I have engaged, enraged, encountered and encouraged a generation of people to be themselves, and I can do this….I can be myself….because I Don’t Care. If we had more, who didn’t care, we could be a society that doesn’t need counseling just to make it through Free Speech Week at Berkley. I was advised by a poster, that some speech, should be anticipated as hate speech, then shut down….Well okay….but then, I’m going to anticipate you, as a threat, and shut you down. Don’t you see, that to be constantly TRIGGERED doesn’t hurt me….but it will destroy YOU? Kevin Hart is a douche bag. Hobby Lobby was not being racist. Not everyone has an agenda, not everyone needs to be qualified in dealing with your issues. All we need to do, is care less, care more, and discern the difference. So yes, I told my friend, that as a black woman in society, I wanted her opinion….didn’t make me racist. I just figured she would know. As far as her hatred of Shock Jocks, well we won’t tell her…it’s our secret. Besides, she’s an Air Force Colonel Pilot (so is her hubby..yikes) and she’s too educated to get me, and yes, I just wrote that those who get me are not educated. I Don’t Care. I just don’t. I’m too old, tired, jaded and honestly, disgusted. I don’t even know the real monsters in society anymore….and for the chicken/egg record…..Racism existed before Trump….he is not the KING….he is simply a product of a society going to hell in a hand basket. Gotta go. It’s almost Fall here, and I hate it. I hate it all….I miss home. Maybe Merrill will cheat on me, have it on film so I can kick him out, leave him, sue him for every dime he’s worth, go home and make it to Festival of Trees. Too petty? Yeah, I Don’t Care. Judge me, don’t judge me…it’s all relative. Besides, you have no idea what I’m going through, so suck it…LOL. Be Blessed.

Remember you set The Tone, you ARE The Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Tuesday….or whatever….I Don’t Care.

 

 

 

 

POS

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What’s Wrong With This Picture?

 

 

So because she has a cell phone out she’s a POS? Screw that. Parenting….traveling with kids is hard enough. Mom shaming has to stop, especially when you don’t know WTF is going on” Ronnie on Amiri King’s comment.

I’m a POS, You’re a POS, We’re all POS….Wouldn’t you like to be a POS too?

So, apparently in this society, you can secretly snap pictures of people being people, then create clever meme’s (pronounced meme) of said subjects, subjecting them to great ridicule and debate. Reminds me, I’d probably better be more careful about picking my nose at a red light. The issue with said activity, is it’s unfair…grossly unfair….to be the star of your little crap show, without the opportunity for context. Frankly, the picture doesn’t even explain what may or may not be going on, like me picking my nose at a red light. It’s a new form of Cyber Bullying, and you know me, I like to dive right in, and fight the crowd in the mosh pit, but it does beg the question, If we can do this to a total stranger, what’s to stop it from happening to YOU? POS….betcha you are one yourself. You need me on that wall you know…..I may be the only defender you have in the entire world.

And so as all good fights go, one woman poster actually said, “If I had seen that I would have smacked her” to wit I responded, “Oh God, I wish you’d smack me. Please….smack me”. LOL, she doesn’t know that I like to fight. I love it, and yes, that makes me a POS, but I don’t care. What bothers me is when you get them down in the dirt, that is you drag their little bitchy ass down by the hair, they gotta go for the kids, and then, I become crazy. Like the kind of crazy that will Google your address and find out where you work, so I can take you out to lunch to discuss your critique of my parenting skills. LOL, right now, my 5th Degree Black Belt Mentor is shaking his head, thanking any god who’ll listen, that he didn’t arm me better…..but I don’t need to be armed….because I’m a POS, and mostly crazy….

I have a deep hatred of only a handful of things. For example, I hate spiders. Not, dislike spiders. I mean, a full-blown it’s-them-or-me hatred that has me literally stooping to some Ninja mess to eradicate them from the planet, and while that took longer than I had planned to paint the picture, you get it. I also hate a bully. If I see you, even if you’re a good friend (which you won’t be, just sayin) humiliating someone undeserving, I will come at you with everything I have. I will end you. I will charge you so fast, you’ll think The Flash is just a little pussy dude made up to try to explain my speed. Do you hear me? If I see you trying to take down someone who clearly doesn’t deserve it, you and I will face off. Beat my ass, I’ll beat yours, but one thing will become clear, you will look over your shoulder the next time you cuss out a driver in traffic. This photoshopping, meme making, total stranger humiliation has got to be the lowest common denominator in society, and if you have that much time to pick on people, you have time to get a 2nd job. You have time to rake leaves. You have to serve at a soup kitchen. You have time to corral protesters in St. Louis. If you think bringing people down to your nose in the muck level, is an amusing way to spend your time, your mommy failed you, and she needs her ass beat, because here’s the truth that hag forgot to teach you, We Are All Pieces of Sh*t, some are just better at getting people to excuse your behavior. You wanna be a badass and tell strangers that you’ll punch someone in the face, based on a picture, go right ahead, and I’ll pray for you…I will….but when the wrong person gets up, looks at you and says, “Oh, now we got ourselves a FIGHT”….I won’t be anywhere around….hell, I’ll be taking pictures…..because I hate a bully….and when bullies get what they deserve, I like to make memes of it…then post it. Gotta go. At any given snap shot in time, we’re all POS’s….how about we not try so hard to humiliate others? Being a parent, being a human, is hard enough, without the judgment. If you have a problem with that, come at me Bro….I’m just getting warmed up. Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE The Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Monday.

Seasons Change

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Now that we have 45 minutes less of light, I try to get out here earlier. I’ll only be out here 4 more Friday’s”…Ice Cream man to Ronnie.

Chris, do you realize we’re in our late 40’s now?” Ronnie

Yes

And do you also realize that I’ve known you since I was 17?”

Yes

Doesn’t that make you feel old?”

Yes

Seasons Change

In HS I had this thing for surfers and skaters. One of my best friends, “Ka Pua” (Hawaiian for flower), will testify that if a guy had a bandana and ear-ring, I got first crack. My HS boyfriend was a surfer of sorts, so it’s easy to see why I fell head over heels in love with Merrill, a  bandana wearing skater, when I first met him.  I look back at those years with a great sense of peaceful nostalgia. I regret NOTHING. Chris and a few of you know me from those days….I’m sure when I become Nefarious, you’ll all get book deals yourself…go ahead. My closet is NOT clean, but screw it…I’ve did what I did….can’t change it….and even if I could I wouldn’t. Seasons Change….but so did I….and I am so honored by each of you….from the bottom of my heart, I thank you, and I love you…

I KNOW I hit the jackpot. I told Merrill as we were traveling back from San Francisco, that I was a blessed woman. I’m overwhelmed with all God has given me, in each of you. I struggled so much as a child….I mean, GOD.. I didn’t have the social graces of a sloth…it was so hard for me to engage and then trust. Only the girls from the block truly understood me, and they were the bestest friends a girl could have, like the “Stand By Me” friends from Stephen King, I was also picked on, because it was too easy. It never occurred to me that one day, I’d be answering hundreds of well-wishes for my birthday. I still can’t believe that I mean something to you….it’s hard to fathom that I would be important enough to acknowledge…but that’s the little girl inside of me….SHE has been my closest confident since childhood….and slowly she’s being placed into retirement.

Seasons Change….Sigh….that which I found endearing at 17 matters little to me now. I’ve been with the same man, longer than I’ve been without him, and while he’s still smoking HOT in a bandana (oh yeah, he’s wearing one tonight), watching him have a tea party with his daughter tonight, made me want him! IDGAF if that’s TMI for you. I’ve changed…The difference in the two Ronnie’s is that the one at 17, would probably not post a selfie of herself, half-naked, and it WAS hard to do that this am, don’t get that mess twisted, but I trusted you all enough to just close my eyes and hit POST! I mean, I looked at that picture a dozen times and picked it apart….I was ruthless to myself….and while I still can’t see what you all see, the more I put myself out there, the more empowered I become by your support. WHY?….Why have you all give me so much? Okay, some words of wisdom: Don’t question the Grace, don’t belittle yourself, don’t begrudge yourself, and for Heaven’s sakes, do NOT….ever….never….ever take a supportive friendship for granted. I wish I had more answers for you, I wish I had the magic words to make you all whole, I wish I had the passage that would touch your soul, but I don’t. What I do have, though, I freely offer to you, because you all first loved me. Seasons Change, thank you Jesus…I leave you with one final parting word of wisdom. The Kingdom Key to LIFE #1 is simply this: People may not remember all you’ve done for them, but the one thing they’ll never forget is how you made them feel. They will support you and pray for all your days on this earth. So, take heart Little Sisters…..had I succeeded at 17, when I tried to desperately to end my life, I would not be here to be so honored today.

Like time…I may have 45 minutes less…..but it will be written, “Here lies Ronnie. She was verily loved“….I KNOW I AM. May God Grace and Bless each and every one of you today. I will never be able to convey how much you all mean to me. Thank you. Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Saturday.

 

Feminism

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Raising a strong woman!

 

The following is an actual conversation that took place at 4pm PST today.

Beemer man: Can I help?

Me: I’m just waiting on the cap to cool so I can put some anti-freeze in. My car overheated.

Beemer Man: Do you know what you’re doing?

Me: Sure, thank you. It’s happened before, but I think I have a leak this time, so I’ll just try to get home.

Beemer Man: (clearly conflicted on what to do here)…Um, can I stick around, just in case?

Me: (Smiling) Sure….

Now at this point, he does help get the cap off, because my hands don’t work well…I pour the anti-freeze in….he waits. I start the car, pull it out to check for leaks. There is one….

Me: Well, it’ll get me home. I’ll go to Autozone for some repair tools….

Beemer Man: That is so refreshing. You’re not from around here….

Me: No sir, but I really appreciate you. Thank you. You take care of yourself….

Feminism….Ladies, be honest. Sometimes it’s US that has the agenda.

You can’t be a living being today, and not be aware of the Feminist movement sweeping the nation, and while I won’t comment on all the nuances involved, I do want to take a moment and defend men. Little Sisters, we have enough BOYS in this society. The ones who just make a bunch of babies, brag on it, then never support them, OR the ones who are perfectly happy lounging around while we do all the work….Commenting back and forth on my status (I posted this on my Timeline), I had made the distinction between actual sexism, per se, and a man, just trying to do the right thing. This situation, reminds of an ongoing debate Merrill and I have about asking for help. “You know, it’s okay to ask for, and accept help” but “help” is a weakness to me! My momma taught me that! Feminism…I don’t think it means, what you think it means.

I don’t like Caitlyn Jenner, but not because I have some strong hatred for all things transgender. No, I don’t like Caitlyn Jenner because she’s stood on the shoulders of great women, and stole, what rightly belonged to others. You don’t get to be a man all of your life, then come in, and pretend you know all there is to know about woman. Women have been greatly disenfranchised for thousands of years. We’ve been bought and sold like property, relegated to the regions that even dogs didn’t have to lie, beaten, abused, raped, assaulted (without intervention mind you), and it took a Constitutional Amendment to give us the right to vote, so really, women haven’t always had the power we enjoy today. I remember visiting a dealership one beautiful Saturday afternoon, and having the Salesman tell me, “Tell ya what. Why don’t you go get your husband and come back? Then we can talk about a car for you.” Screw him! So Caitlyn Jenner doesn’t get to come in, and claim have all we’ve fought for and rightly deserve. With that said..

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I’m not ashamed to admit that there have been times when I’ve used my wiles to attract the attention of a man for my own selfish gain. I’m a cute woman…LOL, a fact I’ve used to exploit the weaker sex many times. Sanchez and I used to go to the club without a dime between us, because we knew, that drinks would flow aplenty once the guys saw us. I mean you don’t get to show your boobs then get mad when a man looks at them, and while I did digress, it does bring up a good point. It is OKAY for a man to help us. Now, if I’m trying to open a pickle jar, and Merrill comes up and takes it away from me, then yes, I’ll get a case of the ass, but if he offers because he wants to help, there’s no shame in saying, “Yes please” and while I’m still working on my “weakness” issue, I am getting better at being gracious. I’m afraid that the Little sisters of the world today, and many of the men that follow them, think that a man offering his help, is a sign that the man perceives her as weak. He does not. He simply wants to help….We do have issues to iron out. We need to discuss abortion, assaults and the subsequent light sentences that go with that, the touches, the promotions, the equality, but the one thing, we as women need to leave completely alone is this ideal that a man is being sexist. I mean, some ARE, but…I just think his momma taught him right, and for the record, my Princess knows how to change a tire, and her Anti-Freeze as well…that’s cause her DADDY taught her right. Feminism.…we don’t need to be such rude ass bitches to every well intentioned man who tries to make sure we’re okay. Don’t muddy the waters by trying to make a mess out of a non-issue. Unless of course it’s Caitlyn Jenner, and then I would leave her on the side of the road. She doesn’t have the mammaries to call herself a woman just yet. Let her get some hair on her boobs, before she tries to come in, and teach the youngsters how to be strong….I don’t care if you don’t like that, I don’t like her. Feminism does have it’s place, but not as a pink whoha hat on the head of an obnoxious woman, who probably hasn’t been laid for a decade….Feminism is that beautiful aura a woman has when she’s confident in her own abilities….Men like confidence….Gotta go….tomorrow is a special day in history…and I gotta get my rest. Right after I get Merrill to fix my radiator hose. Come on….you didn’t really think I’d do it…did you? Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE The Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Friday.

 

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