“Ya know, if you’d teach your kids to beat some ASS, you might not have that problem“. Ronnie to another mommy.
In a moment of weakness this morning I judged the clothing of another child, but not in the way you think. I like to talk to the little girls, while they’re lined up to go to class. Today was Picture Day, and each child was dressed in their Picture Day best. From the ironed shirts with ties, to the adorable little dresses, each parent, myself included, had made sure their child looked their best, for posterity sake. As the little darlings were showing me their shoes (Everyday, each little girl shows me her shoes), I made it a point to compliment every child on their choice of outfits. I said to one little girl, whom happens to be the adversary of Duchess, “My, That’s a beautiful dress and headband. Mommy has good taste in Burberry“, and with that I moved on, but in the back of my mind I was thinking, “WTH? You dressed a 4yr old in Burberry?“. Who Me? Yes…YOU…and I’ll tell you something else, that Burberry dress was Hella Awesome. I was Jelly!
I talked to one of the mommies about the Burberry matching outfit, and she told me that the kids have to be careful how they dress here, because it’s an important function of how they’ll be judged worthy by their peers. Sigh…I get it. I do…bully’s live here too. They’re like cockroaches, they’ll survive any climate. The same mom told me that her son, was bullied by a kid at school for his choice of NFL teams….Okay, now you have my attention…”The schools aren’t doing anything about it here, because of who the parents are“…Now you REALLY have my attention. I responded,”Ya know, if you’d teach your kid to beat someone’s ASS, you might not have that problem“….but the truth is peer pressure, and it’s subsequent consequence, bullying, has been around as long as the clap, but there is one small aspect to peer pressure we’re all missing, and that’s the Individual Mandate that dictates, “No one can MAKE you do anything, you must give permission“, so parents need to set the TONE don’t they? That sounds familiar.
We had social boundaries in Germany too. I was, at one point, made painfully aware that I, nor my father, had enough military ass, to be worthy of anything more than a hook-up….and while that hurt, I swore my kids would not suffer the same fate. It does beg the question though, had my mother affirmed me a little more, would I have been so easily manipulated? I don’t know the answer to that, never will, but I know that in all things parenthood, I have tried to instill a sense of confidence, self-assuredness, and self-reliance in my children, and what I couldn’t do…I paid for. My son is a 3rd degree Black Belt (never get tired of writing that), Duchess is a two-time pageant winner, The Princesses are successful, strong, business women who take little to no sh*t from their men (mommy pride)…and it doesn’t stop there. I’ve told all my children that they can come to me about anything….we’ll talk about anything…Daily I tell them that I love them, I mean, I may not like them much, but I do love them. I try to Affirm and Empower, because they’re going to be without me one day, they’re going to have influence over others, they’re going to need to have a strong foundation to make good choices, and they know that no matter WHAT….I will always be here, I will always have their backs, I will always DEFEND them…til death do us part.
I’m not advocating school uniforms, compliant haircuts, thrift store shoes. Hey, if you have the money, I mean really have the money and aren’t just trying to keep up with Ronnie, buy your kid whatever…but don’t do it so they’ll fit in….because that doesn’t teach self-worth…they’ll spend the rest of their lives just trying to impress others…..No, instead bestow a sense of pride in your children, compassion, empathy, service, heart, home, hearth, hand…(Scouts)…those values clothe, even if they find themselves naked….We set the Tone…We ARE the Example….you want your child to continue where you left off, not wander the desert for 40 years trying to find themselves…..Who Me? Yeah YOU. You can’t avoid bullies, drugs, alcohol, SEX, rock and roll, nor a good ass whoppin, BUT even if they screw up….even if they stray from the way you raised them….they’ll come back…because you gave them a foundation. Gotta go. Ya know, Duchess does have a pair of purple Ugg’s like mine….but I got them for $8 at a rummage sale, and really, I don’t care so much about the fashion, as much as the reason for it. Guess I need to take a step back and clean my own house right? Shut it….like I always say….You MUST do as I say, never as I do, because I am soooooooo NOT a Role Model. I’m Nefarious, and there can be only one. Be Blessed
Remember you set The Tone, you ARE The Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Thursday.