“You were looking forward to this vacation. You had on the rose-colored glasses this time, YOU were the Pollyanna. Still feel that way Stud Muffin?”
“No…not at all” Merrill
It’s amazing how quickly children will make or break a vacation.
It wasn’t/isn’t like it’s the Chevy Chase Vacation of the 1980’s. No, this is the older parents, old enough to be grandparents-parents, vacation. We, like most of our peers, should be sleeping in with children well into teenage years, or maybe even adults. We chose to have our children later in life, therefore, whereas you all are gently sleeping in right now, beds full of goose down feathers, visions of your lazy newspaper in bed while you drink coffee and mess around, we are fighting children…just to go eat. My back hurts, Merrill is starving, and the baby? Well, she’s running around interchanging the phrases “When can we go swimming?” with “When can we go to George Washington DC?” Hmmm, George Washington DC, because our vacations, are not yours. Curse this wanderlusting….
So okay. I am tired, and I am sore. That bed isn’t friendly to those who have bad backs, and Merrill’s been so exhausted himself, that he hasn’t even tried the, “Hey, we’re in a new STATE!” game he likes to play, when we’re in a new state. Chasing two children around the Carnegie Museum, in Pittsburgh, had us both promising that we would never again try to ingrain some culture into these two heathens. Let em be crumbsnatchers for all I care. Duchess chose the Carnegie Museum to exert the “last child privilege”, by screaming at the top of her voice, “NO. You can’t make me”; which was true, I couldn’t make her….but I could drag her, and drag her I did…a 40lbs piece of child through the Chanel collection….I have a hernia now. People thought we were part of the art collection, because art is whatever you make of it…they tried to compliment me on my use of modern child-rearing situations in cultured environments. I have a showing next week. I haven’t pooped in TWO DAYS…there is no Jamie Lee Curtis and her yogurt, nor ESSENTIAL OIL (don’t bother) that’s gonna help me be back on my regular schedule…now if they made an EO that allowed for a total disconnect of your life while you child touches the Van Gogh, and say’s, “That’s ugly”…right next to the sign that states, “Parents, please do not let your children touch the Van Gogh-We will SHOOT you”…then I’ll buy it, and use it. Until then…
Sleeping in until 7am this morning, Merrill announced to the world he was starving, and by God we’d better get ready so he could eat. Generally, I like to sit and drink some coffee before I get up and chase kids. Only 3 zoos in the States have panda bears, and we’re going to one of them today, although, I did swear….on a stack of BIBLES yesterday…..that we were NOT going to the zoo, and that we would promptly turn the Spring Break mobile around and go 700 miles back home….and I meant it….but I was tired…my throat was sore from cursing, my arm was hurt from dragging. When the beautiful king sized bed finally called me, I was out…but by midnight, there were three other bodies in there with me. Sigh….#momlife is pretty cool….but sometimes, it isn’t. Gotta go. George Washington DC and it’s freaking panda’s await. So looking forward to a day of screaming, crying, tantrums, and cursing…and that’s just ME. Baby making is for the young. I should be a Sylvester Granny at 46….but NO. I had to love him, have his babies, and blah, blah, blah. I hate him….him and his little, “This will be fun” attitude. Screw him, he can go raise these children with some young chick who’ll love him for his money. I’M OUT. Panda’s do have it good you know. They just plop out the babies, and they go on to star in loving children’s movies…..To be fat, black and white, and asleep, right now would be so very cool….so very, very cool….Be Blessed.
Remember you set the Tone, you Are the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Sunday.