Tag: duchess

How Soon We Forget

 

 

 

 

 

Boy Could Do Worse

 

Bells on Bob’s Tail rings, making firits bright, oh what fun it is to ‘mumble, mumble, mumble’ OH JINGLE BELLS, JINGLE BELLS“…The recently promoted Toddler to Pre-schooler….singing to herself.

And we’re singing Christmas songs on April 2. Her birthday is October 29, and all I’ve heard is, “Mommy, I want ‘xyz'” and I’m saying, “Hey! At least give me my SUMMER“. She’s started this new thing where she goes around mocking all she finds funny. For example, when Merrill walked up behind me this morning to kiss me on my neck, we heard her (from behind us) mocking “Hey look at me. I’m always kissing mommy. I can’t stop kissing mommy….smooch, smooch, smooch” She is an asshole, because she has this tendency to call things exactly as she sees them, but here’s the thing, while she’s on the front-end getting all the attention being nefarious, her brother is a sneaky snake, trying to get a giggle. “How Soon We Forget”…I had to remind the Instructors yesterday, exactly how “good” of a boy Sweentess really is.

No longer a toddler, Duchess is very at-face value kind of girl. Meaning what you see, is what you get. If you tell her to punch someone in the face she will do just that…punch someone in the face (Girl reminds me of someone…can’t put my finger on it). Her brother, however, is a little more covert than that. Mad at his dad one day, and not wanting to take the heat for himself, he told his sister, “Go punch dad in the face”…liking a good face punch, she did just that, and got into trouble, until she threw her beloved brother under the bus and said, “Bubby said he’d give me ice cream if I punched you daddy”….The truth is the daily fight between the siblings in this house, is mostly a result of Sweetness “I’m not touching you” his sister, and driving her crazy. She might be a tad bit like me.

Telling the story of Duchess recruiting body guard help her regulate a bully at McDonalds, I had to remind all within ear shot that her brother, started the first charter of the Fight Club at his pre-school (it was a short-lived charter), when he was about her age. So they wouldn’t have to go inside and pause their play, HE taught the other boys the short-cut by peeing on the fence. Actually, when the staff came to me to inform me of this malfeasance, I just looked at them and said, “I’m sorry. I don’t see the problem”…..She is a very open, honest, kind of girl. She’s passionate and empathetic to an absolute fault….while he is a sneaky snake, like his father, and nothing brings him greater joy, than to get his sister in trouble for some nefariousness he committed. Even as I write this, his father, the OA (Original Ass) is beating him (the boy) for no good reason….and now we see the issue with HIM. How Soon We Forget. I love The Boy, I really, really do…but we all forget that he had his moments….the same moments we tease Duchess for. I mean, do we really NOT remember the chamber punch, while playing TMNT at his pre-school? Yeah, some kid hit him too hard, so he hit him harder…..Duchess will be okay, it’s the boy I worry about. Now, I gotta go. The Pre-schooler is walking around the house saying, “I forgot how to speak turkey”…Well, I’d like to learn how to speak Turkey too….Think I’ll punch his dad in the face, just because. Yes, I get the irony of exactly who she acts like. Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With you Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Sunday.

 

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Mediocre

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She was thinking of you“…Merrill

Everyone thinks of me, and it’s an amazing feeling to be thought well of…instead of hiding in fear“….Ronnie and Merrill discussing a text a friend sent.

It is TRUE, that to be thought of well, is by far better than to be the target of evil gossip! I only WISH I was Ronnie back then….Today, I’ll beat your ass, and I MEAN it…I’ll…beat….your….ass! Yesteryear, it was all I could do to keep my head up…even if a bully never touches you, it’s still a metaphoric blow, by blow to the head…it crushes your spirit…kills your soul…..YET even in all that….I didn’t learn my greatest lesson. In this life, you will have achieved final enlightenment, when you can honestly admit that you don’t know JACK. If you have problems admitting that, simply enroll in Nursing School, where they will be all too happy (a little too happy me thinks) to disavow you of the notion that you…are educated. Add that to a girl who brings emotional baggage to the table, and you will find yourself in the front row of a classic battle of Good vs. Mediocre. Hmm, Mediocre…I like it.

For as long as our relationship has been in existence, Merrill has said to me, “You’re always so guarded“. You might be asking yourself why, or how I could possible be so guarded with the man I have shared EVERYTHING with, for the last (almost) quarter century. My simple answer is, “I don’t know”….God help me…I don’t know. It isn’t as if he doesn’t know my secrets, but anything that makes me appear weak, (Hallmark commercials, Old Yeller, Charlotte’s Web),  I hold back. I mean, the only way he’s (or you’ll) ever seen me cry is if the dam to my soul breaks….There are abscesses in my soul. Places that holds the rotting food, where the deepest darkest secrets of my life are hidden… I wish I was exaggerating, but just let it be understood, that even in my dysfunction, I cannot be, I will not be…Medorcre, so even my dysfunction isn’t the mundane kind. Well, go big, or go home..that’s what I never say.

Wait! Am I being self-righteous? Yes…yes I am, but understand that I learned a long time ago that only the wounded, can lead the wounded. Only the broken can lead the broken, so if I tell you I am of the Nobility….The Countess of Chaos, Baroness of Brokeness, the Duchess of Dysfunction, the Princess of Picadillo’s, I do so to let you know I know where you are, and I know how to move you forward. No one was meant for mediocrity….for in mediocrity you’re not really living, not really dying….and I may be Bat Sh*t Crazy, but even I know that’s no way to life your life. Nursing School has taught me that you’re either hot, or cold…you cannot be lukewarm, or you will FAIL….I suppose that’s a good thing, have you ever met a Nurse that hates her job? I don’t get that….they destroy you, then rebuild you. You go through all that hell to hate your job? No thank you. I do have to go. Final tomorrow, and I’ll spend the rest of this day crying. It’s not so bad. When you struggle to be Good over Mediocre, Great isn’t too far behind. Well, here’s to me…and those like me…may we all let our guard down a little bit today….life was meant for living…who knows, one day, maybe in your brokenness, you’ll show someone else how to heal their wounds…and in the end…that’s what life is all about. Helping other’s get through theirs…Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those whom cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Wednesday. Duchesses show and tell day 🙂

 

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Mess Happens

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Frankly, you may be a little out of your league. The only solace I take in all this is that you lost a lot of money; which you should have. The reputation you earned here, will be remembered, AND if I may make one more suggestion…require registration next time. It will save you a lot of heartache and money“. Ronnie to the Pageant director, after the worst show of professionalism EVER.

So…Duchess DID NOT get to compete in her pageant yesterday, because at the last-minute, the pageant organizer changed the time of the event, but in hindsight, (theirs not mine) they would have been better served with the original time slot. Mistake number ONE was not requiring registration. Everyone in this business knows that you need the down payment, to hold the slot open and to know how many will be participating….Mistake number TWO was expecting the mall to be complicit in their mistake…I don’t care if you printed off hundreds of fliers with the wrong time, the mall doesn’t have to care about what you do with your events…best advice is to keep the time, it’s what’s called “Accountability”….Mistake number THREE was pissing me off. Mess Happens though, and while it isn’t always OUR fault, we have to deal with the fallout of what someone else thought to do……I think I handled it well…

Long story short, the fliers said 4:30, and no registration was required. “We’re in Bloomington at 4:30” she said to me, “The flier says 11am. You’re gonna have a lot of pissed off mommies” I responded back…but it’s true. No one, and I mean no one I KNOW, likes to have their time wasted…Besides, we were at the mall on Saturday…there were no correction posters…After listening to the woman’s excuses I had HAD IT….so when she asked, “What more could we have done?” I said, “Stick with your schedule. You spent hundreds of dollars on fliers, hundreds more on the crown, and still hundreds more on the mall rent. I hear only 5 showed up to the new time, but here I am looking at several people for the flier time….You lost a LOT of money here”…but it was a tanning company. That would be like me, judging an Engineering fair….in the end, we let Duchess walk the stage, I bought her a cheap crown, we went home, had some Italian beef, and watched the SB. Here’s my point….

The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry, and the truth is, it isn’t always our plans that go rouge. We took lots and lots of pictures, she got to walk the stage and frankly winning the pageant (which we would have, just saying) isn’t the end all beat all of dreams. I was annoyed at the professionalism of the pageant director, but if I think I was the only annoyed mommy that day…i.e. she probably got a lot of calls….then I’m just being arrogant. Our children need to know disappointment on an intimate level, because whatever life they lead after they leave us, is going to teach them that the innocent aren’t always immune to bad luck, we may have plans, but life has other ideas. It’s okay that Duchess didn’t compete, I mean, Hell, if you really want to talk about disappointments, talk to the Falcons…OUCH! The #momlife dictates that Mess Happens, and it’s what we do, and what we model, that’s going to make the difference. They’re not always going to get the job, the car, the loan, the boy, the girl, the promotion, the grade….they’re not always going to get what the want (Thanks Mick Jagger), but they can learn to make due with what they need…and in the end, when the Zombie Apocalypse comes, Duchess is going to need Lucille more than she’ll need the crown…Gotta go. Now that I think about it, Duchess Zombie Killer, has a great ring to it…a little “B” movie action, with my baby girl in the lead. Hollywood, now there’s a disappointment waiting to happen….I mean Hello, have you seen The A Team? No thank you, we’ll just stick to the pageants we know and trust….Sunburst should just keep to tanning. Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Monday….Safe Trip Home Mom….We had a great visit.

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Are You Ready For Some Football

We are a football family.
We are a football family.

I’m not a football fan, but yeah, I might watch the game“….Ronnie to herself.

Actually, my best friend is in Huston right now, working for the Falcon’s. I’m not sure if she worked for the Falcons in 1999 when they lost in Super Bowl XXXIII to the Broncho’s, but this may just be a little coup d’etat for her team….can you imagine spanking the booty of Brady? Yeah, I like that….Brady Booty…it’s got a nice ring to it. I’ve always said once I become NEFARIOUS, my first two orders of business will be to 1. Buy a new house, and 2. Buy Super Bowl tickets, in that order. In a few minutes I’ll be getting in the shower with Duchess, then I’ll put my nose in the book (test tomorrow), and then I’ll anxiously await the arrival of Princess….Gee, I hope the rose petals will be here by then….she had to walk on plain Ole’ asphalt last time. Are You Ready For Some Football? I am….Girls aren’t supposed to know about football….but I’m no ordinary girl…..

So yes, Princess is coming, Duchess has a Pageant today, and we are going to be viewing history….HISTORY….with the ATL Falcons vs. the New England Pats….I hate the Pats. For me it started a very long time ago, when I saw Brady yelling at his coach…or was that Jeff George? I can never keep the two straight because they’re both arrogant a-holes. Now, don’t get me wrong…Merrill is an arrogant a-hole, but he’s so sexy at it. I like it when he walks up to me, put me up against the wall, raise my hands above my head and says to me, “I want you to…” Psych! Did you REALLY think I was going to get THAT personal with you? No, Merrill is a sexy kind of arrogant, not a creepy “Leave me alone with my mattress in the vault” kind of arrogant…..Brady has something WRONG with him…very, very wrong.

So today will be a fulfilling day. My mother is still here, (she’s been fun), and my oldest, middle and youngest child will be in the SAME house YA’LL….same house. Merrill is always amorous on Sunday’s (like a freaking clock), and I’ll be basking in the life that is MINE. Are You Ready For Some Football….I am….but the day threatens to hold more promise than just Lady Gaga at the Half-time show. Budweiser is going to be treading in on the Immigrant debate, Doritos’ isn’t doing a commercial, and I’ll be watching for the Go Daddy ad’s which shows an awful lot of boobies, for a Web Page Hosting site….I don’t get it. “I’m going to WIN the Princess Pageant. Right Mommy?” she said to me the other day, to wit I responded, “I don’t know baby girl, but we’re damned well going to have a blast.” “Damned to the YES Mommy” she responded, and I knew….I was going to be in trouble……Superbowl Sunday.…the last Sunday before things get boring….So, Mr. Tom Brady, if that is your real name, I hope the Falcons STOMP that ASS today, you cry baby, football deflating, pretty boy superstar Michigan Punk Ass Freak! I’d like to see you cry, like a Packer Fan…..Are You Ready For Some Football……How many blessings can this momma take? Gotta go…Duchess is ruining the curlers in her hair…sigh. This may just be a little more difficult than I expected….Sanchez is in Huston….have fun baby! …. Be safe Princess….your siblings miss you….your Grandma misses you too….but I don’t…I mean, come home, stay there….either way….I’m good…Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those whom cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Super Bowl Suuunnnndaaaayyyy! Suck it PATS….

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When I’m A Grandma

16402792_1239221172780933_8971493552307712678_o“I can’t wait to see Nana Mommy. I love my Nana. Is Nana there, or did she go to Walmart? Does Nana know I’m in a Princess Pageant this weekend? Will Nana go watch me? Does Nana know about Dudley? Did she see the drawing I made her? I peed my pants today mommy, don’t tell Nana. I love my Nana”…..Duchess excited to find out her Nana had arrived.

I only know MOM….I have no idea who Nana is! When I dropped her off at school yesterday, I promised The Toddler that when I came back, my mother…her Nana…would be waiting for her at the house. She loves her grandmother, but then again, so do Sweetness and Princess. Funny, I don’t remember her being so cool when I was growing up. When I’m A Grandma I’m not going to be cool. I’m going to be the same hard-ass, jack wagon I am now. Those kids WILL NOT walk over me….oh, and I won’t be called grandma, Nana, Maw or any other cute name…Ms. Ronnie will do just fine thank you very much.

Let Merrill be old and a push over…..I ain’t got time for that mess. Besides once you become a grandparent, you don’t get Nesquick anymore….it’s a law! Don’t get mad at me for that….I like my Nesquick…but I did digress. Duchess is a bad kid…well not a BAD kid, she’s just a little high-strung and high maintenance, but around her grandmother, my mother, she’s a freaking angel. A sweet faced little girl who does what she’s told to do…and I’m like, “Where is my daughter?”…..It really does seem to me, she’d be worse, because my mother lets her do whatever she wants….well, not stomp the roses. She wouldn’t let Duchess stomp her roses, but come on…she didn’t even yell at her…she just said, “We don’t stomp grandma’s roses” and like that…she quit stomping…No, my mom, tells the Toddler to do stuff, and I’ll be damned, she does it….sometimes with a “Okay Nana”….no argument? No fighting? No, “I HATE YOU”?….But my mother is a different person too…. I watched my mom play telephone with Duchess last night and thought to myself, “Hmmm, she never played telephone with me!”

So what is it about being a grandparent that changes one from the “Dear Jesus don’t let me KILL this child” to the, “Oh she’s fine, let her play with my favorite knick-knack”? My mother, patiently sat and watched Trolls last night, a movie that did not impress me, and frankly annoyed me a little bit….but there sat mom…with Duchess snuggled up against her….made me sick. My mother, buys things for the babies, things they don’t need, but to ask her for a new pair of shoes growing up, and I’d have to mow lawns until the cows came home to get a dime from her….No, my mom, will go to Walmart, (when it’s not under a bomb threat), and buy crayons and freaking coloring books for a child who has too many crayons and coloring books. This is not the same woman who raised me….I have no idea who this woman is…….When I’m A Grandma I am going to make those bratty ass children tow the line, and behave…the way I made their parents. No goodie/goodie, ‘Oh they’re so adorable’ persona for me….Let Merrill be the pushover…he doesn’t need Nesquick anyway, and yes, the thought of some of you grandparents having sex, does disgust me….Gotta go. Nana is watching Mickey Mouse with the Toddler….WTH? I don’t even know who that woman is…anymore…..oh and before you hate on me speaking so boldly about my mother, understand that I give the same crap to Sgt. Major…..that man is NOT the Drill Sgt. I remember. If you knew him 20yrs ago..all bossing little GI’s around, you’d not know him today…playing with the grand kids….That will so NOT be ME. I’m too cool to be a push over. Be Blessed.

 

 

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I Give Myself The Creeps

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Sometimes I give myself the creeps. Sometimes my mind plays tricks on me” Green Day….I really don’t like them.

I have a little story to tell all you girls, it’s about Zwei High and to us it’s the world, we have a little group, called the Cavaliers, you’d better listen closely and open up your ears, because they will love you, and they will leave you…they get around, around, around around.” I wrote that my Senior Year in High School….Didn’t get a Grammy or nuthin…..

 

As my son sits his naked ass on the couch, I’m reminded at just how blessed I am to have a family I can yell at in the morning. I mean, it doesn’t do a damn bit of good, but I love my chaos, even if I can’t control it. As he was watching Sponge Bob, ignoring me this morning, I started singing to him….”I don’t have the time, to listen to you whine, I need you to get up and get your ass dressed. I am not a mom, whose married to a Tom” then I stopped there because I tickled myself. I Give Myself The Creeps….that song will be in your head now as well. You’re welcome.

Okay, so I sing to my kids and make the words up. It’s more creative and challenging to create art, where art does not exist. For example, each one of my kids has a lullaby that I made up, just for them. Duchess’s song is to Lola, by Manilow:

Her name was Duchess, she was a baby, with lots of curlies in her hair, and lots of spittle everywhere. She loved her momma, and her daddy too….laughing and swinging…crying and swinging, as for Duchess….she was a girl…

Sweetness and Princess have one too because that’s what I do….I make crap up. One day, I’ll get paid for one until then….here’s something else creepy about me. I don’t call people by their proper names, but by the names I THINK they should have had. I called a nurse “Brittany”. She looked at me like a Sheppard confused, and said, “My name is (xyz)” to wit I responded, “NO…not anymore. You look like a Brittany, your parents made a mistake. You’re welcome”. Once you’ve been given a name, or even a nickname by me, it sticks. I have many friends, those close to me, that I’ve nicknamed….Ronnie Names….I cared enough to send the best.

I cry at commercials. I can’t help it. I’m so freaking sissy ass, that Christmas ad’s with horses with furry feet make me all soggy inside. Merrill makes fun of me, so I tell him, “Well at least I’m not a heartless asshat”. I mean it’s true. I don’t know why my Spirit is so, I dunno, cuddly, but I’ve cried at freaking songs….Hello, have you heard Christmas Shoes? PLUEESE….that will tear you up quicker than a Merrill with Gas…..don’t listen to it if you’re PMS’ing. It will not end well for you, nor your family.

Sometimes I shoot first, then ask questions later. It’s my little dog response to a big, big world. I can’t help it. I’m small see, and I feel like I need to be the big Spike in the world. Merrill likes to tease me just to make me mad. I guess I AMUSE him like a clown or something….I do get him back from time to time. Just the other day, I was reaching into the fridge for a POP, when suddenly I felt the urge to do a back kick…..I knew he was behind me, I didn’t realize was just how close he was, because I caught him right in the crotch…..The look on his face was priceless. I know you shouldn’t back kick men who just had heart attacks, but he was standing right there. What was I supposed to do? Yes I felt bad, so I put myself to bed to think about what I had done….

I Give Myself The Creeps. There’s a lot of foolish little things I do that only those close to me know. I can’t whistle, I hate the sound of balloons in the mouth (UGH), I’m scared of spiders (what?), and I love The Rock (what, what). Chocolate Milk isn’t chocolate milk like you think (a new friend of mine found that out last night), and frankly, I do love Merrill. The only man I’ve ever allowed to impregnate me on purpose. What do you do, that’s personal and weird? I’d love to know. I do gotta go. Still studying…#nursingproblems…that’s another thing I do….I make up hashtags. I figure I’m just one person away from being famous, then I can quit school. Don’t Judge Me. You’d do it too…if you were in my shoes. Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those whom cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Friday…..

 

 

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America’s Best Supreme

America's Best Supreme Winner :)
America’s Best Supreme Winner 🙂

This is nice mommy” Duchess and Mommy at Sonic at 9:30pm.

Big shout to the organizers ofthe America’s Best Pageant. You came, you brought it, you stepped and impressed. Thank you for you time and talents.

Eating a late night dinner, at the cholestrol fueled drive in, Duchess and I were alone, and just talking. She’s a wealth of information…24 hours later, I realized just how tired I was….The next time I even think about attending a 3-day pageant, someone please lock me in a barn (ala Walking Dead style) until I either come out of it, or die….both are good with me. Some would argue that the price, the ultimate reward for chasing that wayward toddler all weekend, was worth it…Well, if you weren’t there…if you didn’t chase the wayward toddler, if YOU didn’t pick up a strand of your beloved pearls that had fallen out of your bag in the parking lot and broke, if you didn’t come and give me one moment of respite when the surprise anxiety attack visited me….then STFU for the crown was indeed adorable, and welcome, but worth it? We’ll come back to that….America’s Best Supreme….Duchess took home TOP (what, what) honors…..I AM proud.

Let me explain….Duchess doesn’t do well in crowds. She never has….as she sat on the floor next to me playing with her Birthday Barbies, I realized that one on one, she’s good. As a digression, I had to laugh, because last week’s Guardian, the one she picked out, had made its way into her Barbie backpack, and she pulled Wonder Woman out she said, “Who put this in here?”….Indeed Wonder Woman was not welcome into the Barbie Group…I wonder if Duchess will ever see the irony in that? Well, she was short on patience, long on attitude. Duchess, had Extro’d all she could for the weekend. This mommy, also an Introvert, understood. For even though we had The Force with us, there was no battery charging stations. The pageant is okay for the short-term….1 day….2 at the most, but 3 days, and you’re looking at a powerful storm of Toddler Meltdowns AND I can’t mad at her, I was feeling the same way. It’s FREAKING EXHAUSTING….so while my precious angel baby, freshly turned 4, was sitting on the floor, I had to make a vow, a covenant with her that in its simplicity stated, ‘Never again’….well, at least until she’s older…I mean come on, she took the whole cookie….The girl’s got GAME.

I made a conscious decision a long time ago not to dress Duchess up “Pageant Style”, believing her beauty and personality (she got BIG personality) enough to carry her through….I’ve made my point…TWICE. Her hair? Not professional….Her Face? Au Natural…..Her Smile? Devious…the following is an excerpt of the official rules:

Can my daughter wear makeup?

We are a natural to soft glitz system. If you want to wear gloss, blush, or mascara that’s fine. Just keep it age appropriate and not overdone. The older the child, the more it is acceptable. We don’t want to see babies with any makeup on. Teens are free to do their makeup as they would any other day.

AND…that rule….like the Pepsi I bring in to class every day….is IGNORED. Why have the rule, and a hair and make-up stand outside the ball room? Now, I ain’t mad at them, but there were so many Jon Benet Ramsey look alike(s) at that pageant, I thought for a second we were being punked in a Toddler and Tiara nightmare. These little girls are going to grow up with massive self-image issues…I mean, that’s the nature of the female beast, why add to the mayhem now? Do you KNOW I had to fight Duchess to get her hair pulled up? If you saw her at all this weekend, she was either beating the hell out of her brother, or ripping the carefully placed glitter and bows out of her hair. Finally, in a stage of complete defeat, I let her go up on stage and just do her….Did I mention she won?

We are in troubling times, but it should make you feel a little better to know that when the time is deemed right, this Duchess, the “Tomboy of the Pageant Circuit” will lead you, to higher ground. She has Will, Strength (try fighting her), Cunning, and a smile that you’d be very foolish to fall for… My Duchess, took home, America’s Best Supreme Crown, and she did it, with nothing but personality. Little Sisters take heed, for when the Deceiver comes and has you truly believing that without “adornment” you are nothing, just look to The Duchess, put some mud on your face, take the fake bows out of your hair, and DANCE….because you are beautiful just the way you are. A perfect Creator, creates nothing flawed, and in you, there is, no flaw. I don’t judge you….I just want freedom for you…..Gotta go. I NEED a shower. While I may go for it again someday, Merrill is THROUGH. LOL, #girlpower is not for the weak…right? I’ll keep him relegated to the baseball, football, Karate of things in life…..but he can do hair., he does hair WELL…that’s what makes him so sexy. BTW, #toddlerdads are adorable…..Stay tuned for tomorrow status, “Another 3rd degree in the world, and he’s just like his father”….can’t wait. Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. Be KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those whom cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, I did make a new friend. She kinda cool….Be Blessed.

 

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Mommy Has A Nauny Too

Mommy Knows Baby Girl....Mommy Knows.
Mommy Knows Baby Girl….Mommy Knows.

“Mommy that’s COLD”….Duchess…squirming as I wiped her perinatal area with a cold wet wipe.

“I know baby, Mommy has a Nauny too”…being empathetic

I’ve done this before….joking with the grandparents yesterday about Sweetness asking about condoms; which I thought he said, “Condo’s” (that’s a funny story), I told Maw and Paw that Merrill and I have an agreement in which he will be responsible for raising a sexually responsible male, whereas I have both girls…seeing how Princess is fairly adjusted and successful, I didn’t do too badly….but I look at Duchess and my heart grows…..nervous….I mean, I KNOW she can handle her business, but what about her weaknesses? SMH…Mommy has a Nauny Too….my sage, not-so-responsible advice for a future Duchess….worked for me, and you see how I turned out…wait…scratch that.

  1. You ARE beautiful….Sadly, there will be those for whom you are just a conquest. Understand that if they’re not willing to woe your soul, they cannot have your body for both are connected. Mommy doesn’t want you having sex before marriage, but if you must, KNOW that it will be your decision…it will be your timing….it will be YOUR choice…Let a man grab you, or touch you, without your permission and you can BEAT the hell out of him….and then beat him senseless….why do you think I gave you Taekwondo?
  2. You ARE going to lead the Zombie Apopcolypse…LOL…with your brother you are both the “Chosen Ones”. You, sweet Duchess, have earned much of what you have…if they want what you have, make them do what you did….True leaders ain’t got time for “talk”. True friends will help you bury the bodies, and that’s allegory baby girl….Don’t really go burying bodies.
  3. Some men are going to be intimated by your inner strength and Will. They will be the ones whom try to reduce you to the sum of your “parts”. A real man, will appreciate the entire you…..your Will, your Strength, your Spirit….I mean, he’ll want to kill you, but he will love you passionately….a real man will be like your daddy. Don’t be reduced to the sum of your parts. You are equal….always remember that.
  4. Be happy for the success you see in others. Don’t demean it, don’t devalue it, don’t envy it. Your light will be a flame to those who see the true Peace of your nature…Love what is good, celebrate what is accomplished… Draw others near you…and you’ll never be alone.
  5. Focus your attention on three things in life: Justice, Equality, and Bags….what you offer, will be offered to you….but it helps to find a man, who understands the importance of all three…..just saying.
  6. Remember the Little Sisters. Remember what they’re going through. Remember what they’re experiencing. Remember what they’re feeling…because you went through it too. You’ve been given amazing gifts….share what God has given you.
  7. When the haters come, when the gossip begins, when it seems like everyone and their stupid brother have something ridiculous to say about you….you’re doing something right congrats…mommy is proud.
  8. Finally, when a wolf, in the clothing of sheep comes, and he will, understand that there were signs you chose to ignore. It’s okay….happens to the best of us. You cannot change a man, you cannot make him love you, you cannot trap him into doing something he doesn’t want to do. A man who loves you will DIE for you, will DEFEND you, will SHARE his life with you…..A good man is better than bad sex…do not throw your pearls to the swine…you’ll get it one day.

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Mommy has a Nauny too….understand that whatever you encounter on your own Road to Damascus, I saw first. See, the thing is that since Biblical times, men…nor other women…that is society…hasn’t changed…..you’re going to be someone baby girl…Remember you are my child….I survived far more than I’ll ever let you be subjected too….talk to your big sister….she’s an amazing source of strength…..I taught her too…..And yes, I’ve had cold clothes there too….you’re right….that is COLD…..Be Blessed.

Remember you set The Tone, you ARE The Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those whom cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Saturday.

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Ranger RN

Ronnie SMASH this test :)
Ronnie SMASH this test 🙂

“I’m gonna like it out there!” Ronnie turning her head, to get a better look at the Ranger RN she just passed.

Merrill is not the insecure…he has no reason to be. He’s beautiful. I like a confident man…like the Ranger RN. Allow me to digress for one moment and say, If I’ve ever insulted you, and you’re an RN, accept my apologies. RN’s have every right to be assholes…and I’m just being honest. They, much like the Ranger School in Benning, go through some nefarious mess to be what they are….In Ranger School, you walk in boy, you walk out a man….IF you walk out. I feel like if you go though hell to achieve a victory, go ahead….you do you boo boo. Ranger RN…reminding me that you can walk through fire, and still look good….LOL.

You thought I was going a different direction with this didn’t ya? Nope….I’m getting ready to do some more math problems so I don’t kill somebody, but a little fluff in the middle of chaos is good for the spirit. I don’t lust…that would imply I had sexual thoughts about Ranger RN, I did not. I’m just able to look at the other brands of chocolate milk, and pass by….you learn to do that if you have all the chocolate milk you need at home…but I know that that Ranger RN and I have something in common…..we both walked through hell….to be where we are….

Okay, so it’s test day, and my usually confident mojo is off…a little. It’s hard not to go back into the battle, in which you were wounded, a little scared…..scared is good….makes you take the danger seriously….know what I mean? I want to meet that Ranger RN and shake his hand….tell him Congrats on being so beautiful….but also, Congrats on defeating not one, but two major hurdles, and maybe more….who knows……If anyone wants to shake my hand, or the hand of Merrill, I’d be okay with that….because it tells us, we’re doing something good….something right….Hmmm, we’re coming upon that HORRIBLE DAY in Merrill History…our HELL…..Merrill Ranger Batt….we survived, but came out changed….like the beautiful RN yesterday, like me at the end of this trial….So because these things have to have a point, if you’re struggling through some mess, I’ll advise you to look at the Ranger RN…(no seriously, look at him), be him…be successful….be beautiful…no one said it was going to be easy, but it IS going to be worth it….I promise….Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those whom cross your path your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Thursday.

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Sunday Babble

What We Did This Summer
What We Did This Summer

“I’m not a very smart person. Am I?” Ronnie to herself, as she accidentally deleted Firefox from her computer

With the deletion of Firefox, also comes the deletion of VP.com and the passwords to all my saved web pages, including Twitter….GRRRRRR, I wish I were a computer expert, because then I wouldn’t have to wait for Merrill to awaken, drink his coffee, take his am shower, then be in a good mood before I drop my faux pas on him. He’ll smile at me, pat my head, and give me some small “that’s okay baby” (said in the same tone used for Fido), then he’ll be my hero, and give me my computer life back…. Sigh….Sunday Babble…It’s Back to School….and while I have a lot going on, I got nothing to say.

1st Day of School is tomorrow; which also happens to coincide with my baby boy’s 10th birthday (I’ll talk about that tomorrow). When I write it’s the 1st day of School, I mean for all of us. Yep, Duchess…my sweet, sweet Duchess, starts school tomorrow too. Once the newness of being a big girl wears off, I suspect she’ll strip (she doesn’t like clothes), smack another child, and start tearing mess up, as she exerts her dominance in that muthur. I’ll be in the Head Mistresses office quite a bit…I’m already aware. Dr. Goel, her ENT, commented, “She is an amazing intelligent child. That’s an MIT graduate sitting there” and frankly, that scares me. Dr. Goel has seen many children get in and out of his chair, he would know intelligent from super MIT intelligent…I BELIEVE his assessment of Duchess….corralling that intelligence has been the bane of my existence. Oh, she has a tonsillectomy scheduled…just saying.

So, I have a 5th grader (Jr. High here), a Pre-schooler, and The Kiddie Pool 2- Nursing School starting tomorrow. I’m a little scared for myself, after all, where do you think Duchess learned her mantra? I too, will probably strip, smack another student, and try to run that muthur…but I have the VA to worry about. …. I did made it through Astro Physics, so I’m smart, what I fear is the clinical’s at the VA. Have I mentioned that they and I do not see eye-to-eye? I’m pretty sure that my clinical appointment request will be denied, and I’m being dead serious. Well, at best, they deny me, at worst they ACCEPT me…..Oh well, Ronnie could use a little humiliation I suppose. Sunday Babble, we have to lunch shop, bath, cut, iron, press, wrestle, clean, cry and of course, PRAY….Ya know, I mentioned to Merrill that now that our baby was going to school….it WOULD be a good time to have another baby….he threatened to punch me in the face, and leave….guess that’s a “HELL NO”…fine, I’ll get a dog instead. Our last day of rest before Fall, Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas…May God Have Grace and Mercy upon our souls….and your soul as well. Let the chaos begin…..Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those whom cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Sunday.

 

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