“Mom, they picked on me and it upset me, because I’m not going to be there much longer. Aren’t they going to miss me“…Sweetness to his mommy….and yes…they’re going to miss you very much baby boy.
“I’m a big fish in a little pond. I’ll have to start all over…I hate that” Ronnie
“Don’t worry Dear. They will judge you just as much out there….as they did here” Merrill
“You think so? You’re not just saying that to make me feel better are you?“….Ronnie
Being of BRAT stock myself, I remember the moves. The terrible “good byes” the “I’ll miss you so much“, the boyfriend who promised to be true forever but the minute you left he made out with Teresa Wimpleton….(skeezer)…but Sweetness…is not a BRAT. See, unlike Merrill, I hated the Army life. I hated the moves, the quarters, the commissary, the 1st…the 15th….the groceries….I mean it…I….for all Intensive Purposes (I know) did not like the constant unknown that being in the military offered. We attended anti-terrorism seminars, we learned the language, we practiced OPSEC, we had AFN (and ONLY AFN), the military commercials that meant well, “Don’t Shop When You’re Hungry…no, no, no”….easily the hardest part of that life was never having roots, and I tried really hard to give my kids roots. Parenting 101…they don’t write decent books for my son’s broken heart. I suck at being a good mom….
I’m afraid…there I said it….more for me, than him, but still…..what if the Ca mommies don’t like me? Yep, that was our fear growing up military too…Sigh. My son and I have different personalities. We have some of the same features, like our noses, but for the most part, he is way kinder than I. When I meet anyone for the 1st time (and really…ask yourself this) people aren’t sure whether to let out an uncomfortable laugh (ahem), or to just go ahead and judge me an outright bitch. Its’ not my fault most people are super-sensitive prudes who wouldn’t know a joke if it bit them in the face, nonetheless, it takes time to warm up to me…always has. Ask Sanchez, my best friend from High school, what happened the day we met…YEP…and it goes, that my son isn’t used to meeting new people. He, like the gang from Goodfella’s, has his entire comfort zone right here…but I did that. I created that cocoon of family and friends so that my babies would have, what I never did….then again, I never…ever realized Merrill would move us….Sigh.
It’s not a bad thing. Hell, half my friends are BRATS, they get it….but be honest, being a nomad kinda sucked right? It didn’t help that yesterday that my sweet angel face baby boy saw his favorite teacher in Meijer and had to tell her he was leaving. When she made the comment, “Oh that’s too bad. I was looking forward to having your sister” I knew I had to run, because I could see the countdown to meltdown had begun. So his friends, the ones he grew up with, teased him yesterday and he couldn’t understand why. After all, he was leaving and wanted good memories. “Well baby boy” I began, “the truth is, they’re sad. They can’t tell you that, so they’re gonna beat the hell out of you“….and it’s true. Our hearts and minds do not always sync up. I know his friends are going to miss the sh*t out of him, because we are going to miss the sh*t out of them….in some ways, being a BRAT saved us from the awkward, long, slow-clap goodbye’s……Parenting 101.…I swear to all things Nefarious, you are damned if you do, and freaking damned if you don’t. There is no good way to raise your kids….but it seems like I always get the, “Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda’s”…..So his friends are going miss him, but they won’t say that. Instead, they’ll insult him, pick on him, gang up on him, anything to starve away the tears. “Why can’t they just say what they mean?” he asked…..Yes well, not everyone is ME….Gotta go. Parenting…they don’t make an App for that….Dear Lord….be with my baby and succeed where I failed….He is my world, and a true-hearted gift from you….Now, I have some people to insult…ahem…meet. Excuse me. Be Blessed.
Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Tuesday.