Tag: vacation

Merrill Family Vacation

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BEEP, BEEP, BEEP…..” Merrill’s annoying phone alarm at 5am.

Every other year, per the Labor Day agreement 2011, Merrill and I go on vacation with his family. It a fun little caravan jaunt we take to Lake of the Ozarks, it involves three Merrill/Anderson vehicles…filled to the brim with lots and lots of kids who get to spend the week with their grandparents. By the time it’s all over, even the patient grandparents are ready to give them back…It’s fun, IF you like that sorta thing. I do not, but I love them, and so we go…! Not for nothing, but my mother lives a few short miles from The Lake, and so, this will be the perfect time to take the kiddo’s to go see her, before we’re California bound…Win/Win. Not only is my Princess, The Beautiful One, going with her significant other, a man who may or may not become a SIL, but also, unless you live under a rock, you know we’re moving….This is the last vacation with the family…..Don’t think this thought isn’t in the back of his sweet mother’s head…. Merrill Family Vacation…Here we go….

We leave in an hour or so. See, that’s the final giggle in my head. Merrill time is the time they set to be at the meeting point, BUT not the time we leave…it’s always about an hour or so difference. We take three vans, one pontoon, two jet skies, dozens of kids, 4 female head-of-house holds, husbands, grandparents, food, luggage and a partridge in a pear tree…..we stay in one condo. You do the math. Hmm, things are moving quickly now, as we begin to experience the “lasts“. Last night, was my last time at ATA, this am was the last time I get up early for Merrill Family Vacation. I will miss this Chevy Chase craziness….I mean even though they drive me BSC….I will miss it. Sorta….I will sorta miss it. For now, allow me the rest of my coffee…as I sit and work up the nerve to get ready. Oh HEY! Princess is due here soon….YEAH….wait….I’m leaving her behind too..this is my last trip with her for a while….Boo! Damn, this is going to be on Bi-polar day…Excuse me…I need more coffee. Be Blessed.

Actually, I’m going to miss them very, very much…..:(

 

remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Saturday.

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Goodbye To You

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There was so much more we could have DONE!!!!” Ronnie whining to Merrill.

Goodbye To You George Washington DC…until we meet again.

Freaking men. Like clockwork, the day comes when it’s time to go home and they’re up at the crack of DAWN, rounding up anything with life, to eat and get in the car. Forget him. I had the kids most of the week, I know how to work them, and I’ll get them ready, when I’m ready….I don’t why he’s in the hurry to drive back and hear me whine for 12hrs….but he is a glutton for punishment. So it wasn’t the most romantic of vacations. It was COLD, the Cherry Blossoms had been killed in the blizzard last week, Duchess had a melt-down at least once a day, and I slept like hell….Truth is, Merrill had to work most of the week, so it was just the kiddo’s and I. I tell people he’s the VP of Something Ridiculous, but the truth is, I don’t know what he does, and he told me a long time ago that I was to never ask about his affairs. Doesn’t really affect me, anyway. As long as I’m comfy in bags and bags…I’m good. Goodbye To You….I had the babies all to myself, and it was lovely. The #momlife isn’t so bad, when the brats behave.

For what it’s worth, we (I mean ME) tried to keep it fairly upbeat because I’m not afraid to admit it, the Toddler rules our lives. The only somber part of the vacation, the part I INSISTED on, was the Vietnam War Memorial. As I held Duchess’s hand, I reminded her that we needed to be silent and show respect for what the departed had done for us…She was good…I was good. Sweetness and I had a conversation about the history of the conflict, and I let my Conservative Army Brat show….the rest of the visit, from the 5 mile walk in downtown DC to the Aquarium, to the Smithsonian was nice and smooth…even without their daddy. I managed to drive in these two mega cities, got lost only once, and only earned myself ONE ticket…I’d say it was a good trip….

We are ready to get back to the hustle and bustle of LIFE/SCHOOL….the dreaded monster that is NURSING, the house, the dogs, the cat who thinks he’s a dog, the spiders, the whateves….For a minute, I actually relaxed and had a great time with my babies. Maybe we’ll come back, mayhap we won’t, but the magic of this Spring Break will always be remembered. The toddler will be old enough in 6yrs to enjoy it herself….we’ll be back….I love Wanderlust, and I love that my kids have it….being an Army Brat will do that you know. Oops, I gotta go. Merrill is very impatient to get me in the car. Wish us safe travels back….Goodbye To You George Washington DC….I’ll miss you. Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, “I’m COLD”, enjoy your Wednesday.

 

 

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George Washington DC

She IS Adorable
She IS Adorable

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You were looking forward to this vacation. You had on the rose-colored glasses this time, YOU were the Pollyanna. Still feel that way Stud Muffin?”

No…not at all” Merrill

It’s amazing how quickly children will make or break a vacation.

It wasn’t/isn’t like it’s the Chevy Chase Vacation of the 1980’s. No, this is the older parents, old enough to be grandparents-parents, vacation. We, like most of our peers, should be sleeping in with children well into teenage years, or maybe even adults. We chose to have our children later in life, therefore, whereas you all are gently sleeping in right now, beds full of goose down feathers, visions of your lazy newspaper in bed while you drink coffee and mess around, we are fighting children…just to go eat. My back hurts, Merrill is starving, and the baby? Well, she’s running around interchanging the phrases “When can we go swimming?” with “When can we go to George Washington DC?” Hmmm, George Washington DC, because our vacations, are not yours. Curse this wanderlusting….

So okay. I am tired, and I am sore. That bed isn’t friendly to those who have bad backs, and Merrill’s been so exhausted himself, that he hasn’t even tried the, “Hey, we’re in a new STATE!” game he likes to play, when we’re in a new state. Chasing two children around the Carnegie Museum, in Pittsburgh, had us both promising that we would never again try to ingrain some culture into these two heathens. Let em be crumbsnatchers for all I care. Duchess chose the Carnegie Museum to exert the “last child privilege”, by screaming at the top of her voice, “NO. You can’t make me”; which was true, I couldn’t make her….but I could drag her, and drag her I did…a 40lbs piece of child through the Chanel collection….I have a hernia now. People thought we were part of the art collection, because art is whatever you make of it…they tried to compliment me on my use of modern child-rearing situations in cultured environments. I have a showing next week. I haven’t pooped in TWO DAYS…there is no Jamie Lee Curtis and her yogurt, nor ESSENTIAL OIL (don’t bother) that’s gonna help me be back on my regular schedule…now if they made an EO that allowed for a total disconnect of your life while you child touches the Van Gogh, and say’s, “That’s ugly”…right next to the sign that states, “Parents, please do not let your children touch the Van Gogh-We will SHOOT you”…then I’ll buy it, and use it. Until then…

Sleeping in until 7am this morning, Merrill announced to the world he was starving, and by God we’d better get ready so he could eat. Generally, I like to sit and drink some coffee before I get up and chase kids. Only 3 zoos in the States have panda bears, and we’re going to one of them today, although, I did swear….on a stack of BIBLES yesterday…..that we were NOT going to the zoo, and that we would promptly turn the Spring Break mobile around and go 700 miles back home….and I meant it….but I was tired…my throat was sore from cursing, my arm was hurt from dragging. When the beautiful king sized bed finally called me, I was out…but by midnight, there were three other bodies in there with me. Sigh….#momlife is pretty cool….but sometimes, it isn’t. Gotta go. George Washington DC and it’s freaking panda’s await. So looking forward to a day of screaming, crying, tantrums, and cursing…and that’s just ME. Baby making is for the young. I should be a Sylvester Granny at 46….but NO. I had to love him, have his babies, and blah, blah, blah. I hate him….him and his little, “This will be fun” attitude. Screw him, he can go raise these children with some young chick who’ll love him for his money. I’M OUT. Panda’s do have it good you know. They just plop out the babies, and they go on to star in loving children’s movies…..To be fat, black and white, and asleep, right now would be so very cool….so very, very cool….Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you Are the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Sunday.

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80’s Movie Catchphrases

Me, in the 80's.
Me, in the 80’s.

BTHTM (Bad Things Happened To Me). What? It’s a work in progress” Ronnie

Very Little Progress” Merrill….

Sigh.

There are many, many wonderful things about the 80’s…..Actually, my inspiration arrived with my bagel yesterday when they didn’t give me a knife for my cream cheese. Getting up and getting my own, I tickled myself when I saw the bread knife and went, “That’s not a knife” out loud to no one in particular. “I wonder how many people would get that reference?” I again said out loud, and by the time I reached the table, I had my status for today. Thanks for all the help friends….80’s Movie Catchphrases.…if you know it…shout it out.

10. That’s Not A Knife….of course it had to make the cut, it’s what started this parade. A great, little down home movie, it would take a few more decades before Australia would become creepy with cheesy, true story horror flicks.

9. The Royal Penis Is Clean, Your Highness– (Amy McQuown)….An adorable little film, that saw the sales of pink, flu-flu wedding dresses go through the roof. At the height of the Murphy/Hall popularity, this film gave us all a chance to see just how the other side lived…Sexual Chcocolate Everyone….”Damn I like that boy”….

8. Can I borrow your towel for a second, my car just hit a water buffalo…(Hope Garrett) Now I don’t really KNOW that this one is well-known outside of those who are true fans of the lead character. Merrill is…I’ve seen this movie more times than I’ve seen his naked ass, so I’m pretty well versed….Dedicated to my dear hubby….who’ll probably go watch the movie now. “Love Your Body Larry”.

7. Hey laser lips, your momma was a snowblower….(Christina Milburn) I’ll be honest, I saw the movie, I didn’t memorize this one. This one is a little obscure…no Google peeking….but a total cult classic….

6. I feel the need, the need for speed….(Hope Again)….Come on…too easy….Just as easy as “Talk To Me Goose“; WHICH, is still in use… Did you know that enrollment went up 300% percent after this movie…Val Kilmer is a stone, cold, FOX…Mmmm…

5. I pity the fool, and I will destroy any man who tries to take what I got!.….(Lacey Waters) Yes, after this movie, (or was it before) everyone knew who this man was….Truth is, one could stop at “I pity the fool” and a true child of the 80’s would know the answer before, “I pity”…..he was pretty Bad Ass…..and I’ll leave it right there.

4. He doesn’t even have a license Lisa…..Lots and lots of young stars here….It was the voice, more than the phrase that made this movie what it was….Every girl wanted to be Lisa….Sigh.

3. You keep saying that. I do not think it means, what you think it means…..My #1 favorite movie of all time, and TRUST, we can go all day with movie quotes from here. Drives my hubby BSC that I will sit and recite every line in the movie….Princess will be home soon…I’ll need to get it out….Good Night Princess….I’ll see you in the morning…..”I’ll most likely kill you in the morning mom”….(mommy tear-excuse me).

2. Bet you could use a cool one Clark….Ahh, this actor’s movie made the list TWICE. A big deal in the 80’s, his 3rd installment became one of the biggest Christmas movies EVER.

1. Yippee Ki Yay MF....This movie IS considered a Christmas Movie, one of the greatest Christmas Movies of all time, and he say’s this phrase in every subsequent film…it only matters in the first one. I was actually just thinking about him the other day in Moonlighting…..now look at him….

So, I only had room for 10 80’s Movie Catchphrases. I am SURE there are several more out there that would have made the list…feel free to add yours. There were lots of entries (I put a post on FB), but the problem was, many of the films were early 90’s and therefore, ineligible. Do you have an 80’s movie catchphrase you’re famous for using? Share it with us, but don’t give us the movie….let us guess it. Okay gotta go. Last day of clinical….I’ll miss the VA. It’s almost over friends…..pass, fail, win, lose or draw, it’s almost over….or should I say, “Yippee Ki Yay MF”? Don’t report me….it’s a real movie. Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those whom cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Wednesday. Too Many Damn Vampires….:)

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Let Me Clear My Throat

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“Ahem, Ahem” DJ Kool, Dougie Fresh…..

I only have a few minutes before Merrill, aka Clark Griswold, sweeps us out of here and into the Happiest Place on Earth. First of all, it is a misnomer that Magical Kingdom is a place where all your dreams come true. It’s freaking 102 degrees, and my real dream is to be in Jamaica with Merrill’s cousins, but because I chose to have babies so late in life, I’m going to be singing Zippidy Do Dah out of my ass all day, with a Duchess, that at about 1p, won’t even want to be there anymore anyway, HOWEVER, because we mortgaged the house to pay for the tickets and plane ride, Merrill is going to make us stay there and nap in the family restroom. I married him because he’s cute….and great with Nesquick, not because he’s the world’s best compromiser, but he means well, and good Nesquick is a pretty hard to find…. Let Me Clear My Throat…I got some things to get off my chest.

Number ONE, if you post anymore pictures of abused children, and it reaches my Newsfeed, I will hide and possibly delete your ass. That’s it. I can’t do it anymore. Truth is, as an Empath, I have a responsibility to know what my triggers are. For me, its abuse. Any kind of abuse. For years (well since the advent of FB), I’ve kept silent at the horrific photographs of children, pets, seniors..and the abortions that were scrolled upon my pages…I’m an Animal Advocate, so there is a certain level of abuse I DO deal with (realistically) but I don’t have to see, know, or read the innocent children. Do you KNOW how helpless I feel when I see those images, and frankly, some of them aren’t abuse, but memes created to start mess. I’m done! Why do that? “Oh everyone needs to know”, Umm, no they don’t, and half the time, the poster doesn’t even have permission of the parent to post the volating pics of the babies. If my kids were abused, I’d post the picture of the corpse….the corpse of the abuser, not violate the privacy rights of my children, whom frankly would have been through enough already….Abuse is of Satan….I MEAN IT….I choose Peace….I’m done. It takes me hours, sometimes FREAKING days to get those images out of my mind, if that offends you, I’ll miss you, but maybe not really.

Number TWO, I will no longer tolerate the misleading meme’s that seems to have corrupted our society! Clinton laughing because she got a child rapist off….NO SHE DIDN’T…I had to go investigate that one personally. Read the damned things, snoop it, hire a medium, but for the love of God, stop committing the sin of Gossip and spreading untruths; which you KNOW are untruths, just because you simply don’t like a candidate. I don’t like either candidate…but so far this season, we have a crook, a liar, a pussy, a bigot, a bitch, a weasel, both rich AND morally poor, they do not need our help looking bad. Every time I go on Snoops, it says, “Welcome back Ronnie”. I need Peace and frankly, after all the crap we share, I’ll need an enema by the end of the day. We get it…both candidates are assholes….they suck! Now can we talk about things that really do matter…like my sex life, my kids….how cute they are….how well Princess turned out…how nice my nails are….my bags….Your kids, your nails, your sex life….your bags…..I mean anything other…than hate. As a digression, it was brought to my attention that some of you don’t know what “Nesquick” means…I love it when someone asks….I love most of you (some of you, not so much), and if you leave, I’ll understand….but please….for the love of all things sane….stop with the abuse, the hate, the gossip….no wonder we’re all on antidepressants. Gotta go. Merrill thinks he’s being adorable right now. I’m just trying to stay mentally afloat…there’s no way he’s getting Chocolate Milk, and 18 hours at Disney in the same day….Let Me Clear My Throat….with my mood, I may have to go hide him too. Be Blessed.

Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those whom cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Thursday.

 

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Christmas Vacation

I was 17 with the whole world ahead of me...
I was 17 with the whole world ahead of me…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I don’t know if Merrill had a moment of brilliant inspiration, or if he saw it somewhere, and was taking credit for it. I tend to sway more toward the latter than former, however as he is an amazing father (it really IS the only reason I keep him around), I’m going with it’s his creation….what on earth could I possibly be talking about? Well, we’ll get to that.
It seems like when we were kids in the 80’s Christmas break was like, I dunno, 8wks long. We’d get out right after Thanksgiving, and go back right after Valentines Day, but of course, that isn’t right. Christmas Break, the half-way school year calendar point that signals you are almost finished, but not quite yet. I remember being on Bunker Hill during Christmas Break. Walking the Fussganger, the German Christmas Markets, the bread smells, the snow, gluwine, then clubbing like it was 1999 later that night…I grant you, my childhood was a tad bit more, um, riske than many of my American Co-horts. Some may not be able to relate to that last activity. We had the Px, Commissary, castle parties, little pubs…. we slept in, went out, we had our right to party. But then….the reason for the season….
Christmas. Silent Night, Away in a Manger, the empty base, the ghost town “economy” all is calm…all is bright. If we were lucky, it snowed, if we were lucky, our friends parents would let us come over, if we were lucky, we would get the gift we wanted…..Christmas Vacation encompassed the magic and promise of the season…..Today is the last school day of 2015 for Sweetness, and I envy him. I envy him, because Christmas as a child is…………..OH Wait! I almost forgot……What was the brilliant inspiration of Merrill’s that I was going to share with you? Well he said, “Christmas as a child was magical, but Christmas as a parent, is Divine”….He’s right….Christmas as a parent IS Divine, and while I had an amazing teenage experience in Germany, I’ll take being a parent on Christmas all day, every day, twice on Sunday’s…..but still…..to have that last day before the Christmas Break feeling one more time…That would be the Fountain of Youth….Happy Christmas Vacation folks……Be Blessed. Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Tuesday.

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You Have My Permission

It's okay. I got your back.
It’s okay. I got your back.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In what would be the first, last and only democratic vacation election, our girls, The Princesses, were offered the opportunity to put their vacation choice into a baseball cap with the first two destinations thrown out. The final two choices sat resting in a Cubbie hat and a family vote was held to determine where our summer retreat would take place. I don’t remember which two were left but what I do remember was that the final two bids, were the choices of the girls. Princess voted on the other choice, not hers, and lost her election. Later, when asked her why she would vote for the opposition, she responded, “Well, I thought she was going to vote for mine” and there within we find a Kingdom Key to Motherhood and ultimately LIFE. Teaching our kids that it IS okay to be selfish and not get screwed.

It is ironic that when we finally let our guard down we get screwed? My heart has only been broken ONE TIME, and frankly, ONE TIME is enough. Can I get an AMEN? The best defense against a broken heart, is a good offense against anyone seeking to do us harm….but….The warning signs WERE THERE. He told me he didn’t want a serious relationship….I thought he was kidding…..he was not….You see, when our defenses down, that’s when we get sick, so no, its isn’t ironic that we get screwed, but inevitable…yep, just a matter of time. Listen Little Sisters, If you…have to….change yourself….to keep him….he’s TRASH. Throw him out.

It’s not selfish, its strategy. Even on air planes, the rules state that we must, “Put our own mask on first”. If you gamble your behavior, on what the behavior of others MAY be, you will lose on both bets. Society is based on the whole pie, not the individual slice, you are the individual slice. You Have My Permission to be selfish. You are allowed, to vote, for YOURSELF. I look back on him now and see that he wasn’t a bad guy, I was just a bad candidate. I’m glad he’s happy…because I am TOO. Don’t be fooled into putting your most precious possession on the table….if you don’t vote for you…no one else will, AND you will get screwed! I don’t know how else to write it. Okay gotta go. Duchess and Sweetness are both due up….I’ve almost got this mommy thing down, now if I can clean up my language, I’d be perfect. I think I want another baby. Be Blessed. Remember you set the Tone, you ARE the Example. BE KIND to each other. Show GRACE and MERCY to all those who cross your path today. With your Daily Affirmations complete, enjoy your Tuesday.

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